A recent study reveals that not only are up to 81% of caregivers women but also that they volunteer 50% more time giving care than men. Even female spouses who work full-time jobs still spend 40% more time giving care than their male partners.
Asha Tarry is a renowned psychotherapist and the founder of Care for Caregivers who often sees women caregivers neglecting their own mental well-being as they take on the caregiving role. Here, she offers five strategies that empower them to prioritize their mental health to provide the best care possible.
1. Women caregivers seek support
According to Tarry, if women hope to navigate the caregiving journey with resilience, they must learn to find resources and support. Connecting with caregivers who share similar experiences can provide an invaluable support network. Joining support groups can offer a safe space to vent, seek advice, share experiences, and find solace in the understanding and empathy of others.
“Various online platforms and local community organizations offer caregiver support groups that can be accessed from the comfort of your home or within your geographical area,” says Tarry. “Participating in these groups not only provides emotional support but also enables you to gain valuable insights and coping strategies.”
In this digital age, online platforms, websites, and forums offer a wealth of information on caregiving techniques, self-care practices, and community resources. Women can access online platforms that provide a directory of specialists for the aging, such as home attendant services or visiting nurses, podiatrists, and geriatricians. By utilizing them, women caregivers can access a vast network of knowledge, gather practical tips, and find empathy from a global community of caregivers.
Professional support can also help women caregivers navigate the complexities of their role. These include professionals who can advise clients on legal matters, such as health-care decision-makers for your loved one’s power of attorney, a living will, or a trust that protects your loved ones’ assets while receiving care and after they expire. When women consult with healthcare professionals — including therapists and counselors who specialize in caregiving — they obtain an objective perspective and practical tools to navigate the demanding and emotionally challenging aspects of their caregiving journey.
2. Women caregivers practice self-care by doing micro steps and giving themselves more time to complete them
Caring for others can be overwhelming, especially for women caregivers who often juggle multiple responsibilities like working full-time and having small children. Women need support on all levels, including respite from caregiving, people to assist with practical things like grocery shopping or escorting them or their loved ones to appointments, and checking in on their emotional health.
Women also need help from people who can help them find resources to access easily without having to do all the legwork, like making phone calls to providers, scheduling health appointments, and finding time for pleasure, which is a boost to their mental well-being. By caring for themselves, women can ensure that they have the physical, emotional, and mental stamina to effectively care for their loved ones.
One of the most important aspects of self-care is prioritizing physical health. Women should not only maintain tasks like attending regular medical check-ups, eating a balanced diet, exercising regularly, and getting enough sleep but also break them into micro steps. This way, they can ask for help with building a short list of tasks and find psychological rewards such as a feelings chart to use at home when they’ve completed one of their goals for the month.
“It can be challenging to find time for these activities,” Tarry remarks, “but remember that by investing in your health, you ultimately improve your ability to care for others.”
Tarry also advises women caregivers to allocate time for activities that bring them pockets of daily joy and fulfillment. Whether reading a book, pursuing a hobby, listening to music, or spending time in nature, they should implement activities that rejuvenate them and nurture their passions.
Women caregivers should schedule regular breaks and use the time to relax, recharge, and engage in activities that help them unwind. Taking breaks benefits overall well-being and enables caregivers to be more present and effective when they resume caregiving responsibilities.
3. Women caregivers set realistic boundaries and be firm where necessary
Without clear boundaries, the responsibilities and demands of caregiving can quickly become overwhelming, impacting women’s physical and mental health.
“Knowing your limits is the first step in setting effective boundaries,” notes Tarry. “Reflect on your physical, emotional, and mental capacities. Ask yourself questions like: What’s the block of time I can create for laundry and grocery shopping or meal prep today? What tasks can I manage comfortably? Identifying your limits will allow you to establish realistic and achievable boundaries.”
Effective communication is vital when setting boundaries, which is why women caregivers must talk openly with care recipients, other family members, and their support network. Establishing this open dialogue helps create a supportive environment where everyone understands and respects one another’s limits.
Learning to say no is a crucial skill for any caregiver. “While empathy and compassion are essential qualities, remember that it’s okay to decline requests when they exceed your capabilities or interfere with your well-being,” says Tarry. “Prioritize your own needs and be assertive in setting boundaries to prevent caregiver burnout.”
4. Women caregivers practice deep breathing as a form of stress management
Because caregiving can be incredibly stressful, women caregivers need to develop coping mechanisms to manage and reduce stress. Stress management techniques like deep breathing exercises, journaling, or exercise often help women stay calm and centered.
Exercise has been shown to reduce stress levels, boost mood, and improve overall health. Even a short walk or yoga session can significantly reduce stress levels and boost energy.
Meditation and mindfulness practices can also be effective stress management techniques. They enable women caregivers to focus on the present moment, reduce anxious thoughts, and feel grounded.
5. Women caregivers learn to ask for support and be honest with themselves about who in their network can provide it
Women often feel the need to be strong and self-sufficient in caregiving roles. Some perceive asking for help as a sign of inadequacy. Others worry about burdening others with their responsibilities, fearing their demands are too much for the people around them to handle.
“Recognize that you cannot do it alone,” advises Tarry. “Acknowledge your limitations, and understand that asking for help doesn’t make you any less capable. Embrace that reaching out is a sign of strength, wisdom, and self-awareness.”
Women caregivers can start by listing family members, friends, neighbors, or community support organizations that could assist with caregiving tasks. They can identify each person’s skills, availability, and willingness to help. Next, they must clearly communicate what tasks they need help with and how others can contribute.
“Share your list of tasks, allowing others to choose areas where they feel comfortable helping,” explains Tarry. “Create a schedule or a shared calendar to ensure everyone is on the same page. While asking for help, be assertive, honest, and direct about your needs. Clearly articulate the challenges you are facing and the impact it has on your well-being, and then explain how their assistance can make a significant difference.”
Prioritizing mental health by seeking support, practicing self-care, setting boundaries, managing stress, and asking for help is crucial for women caregivers. As Tarry explains, taking care of your mental well-being is not selfish. Rather, it is necessary for sustainable caregiving.